DON'T VACUUM NEAR THE CHRISTMAS TREE

I was only trying to help.
I thought if I vacuumed the lounge area that'd be a help. Unfortunately, things didn't turn out as well as I thought they would've.
The curtains hang right down to the floor in the lounge room and I was doing the floor. I had the foot off the bottom of the hose at the time. The next thing I knew I was sucking up the drapes! So, I reefed the curtains out of the hungry vacuum cleaner, but didn't realize that the weapon was now heading for the Christmas tree! Oh no! How could that be? That wasn't what I wanted. I pulled the hose away and down came the tree. How did that happen? I was only trying to help. You know those beautiful decorations? The vacuum cleaner just loved them. Straight in. Where are they? Gone!
ggg
There used to be lovely curtains, a balanced, beautifully decorated Christmas tree and a bunch of presents under the tree. After my onslaught, it didn't resemble the original at all.
ggg
Does anybody want a vacuum cleaner?
dd
I wonder if there are any other jobs around the house that I can tackle which will help my lovely wife. Now you know why they invented men's sheds!